What If I Don’t Get Anything in Return?

What happens when you sacrifice so much and get nothing in return?

According to my Daddy, “You nut the hell up.” *Insert laughing emoji

So, if you’re an ART Undone follower, you’ve probably been wondering where I’ve been. I wish I had a bright shiny object or exciting news to make up for my absence, but unfortunately, all I have is the truth. The truth is one of the many things I’ve had to sacrifice in the process of trying to reach a goal was ART Undone. Trust me, it was NOT an easy thing to give up.

While I would like to take this opportunity to boast about how I reached my goal and I’m fully back in commission, that would be a lie. Unfortunately, I did not reach a goal I’ve been striving for. I sacrificed quite a lot to achieve this goal and I failed. I’m not a failure, I just failed. I’m okay with saying that. I’m okay with admitting to you and myself that I did not meet my expectations and I’m pissed about it.

Why? Well for the obvious reasons but also because I sacrificed a lot mentally and physically with nothing to show for it but some mental battle scars and a few extra pounds -_-. Do you know that feeling? It’s a very annoying, enraging and numbing feeling. The absolute worst!

So, where am I now? I’m here, thinking of how to move forward. Reflecting on my decisions, I have no choice but to ask myself, “What am I willing to sacrifice when there is no guarantee of succeeding?” Honestly, I don’t know if I have the exact answer, but I’m figuring it out.

One thing I know for sure is that my passion is not up for grabs. ART Undone is not just a blog for me, but a friend, an outlet and a form of self-care. I don’t want to just come here when I have everything figured out. I want to be honest and let you know that I don’t have it all together. I don’t come bearing gems every post because I’m still working on it. I’m still asking those questions that I don’t have the answers to. What I do come with is the truth, and the truth is that I CAN simultaneously be a work in progress and masterpiece at the same time.

Basically, I don’t owe you the accolades without the journey attached. After all, this is called ART Undone for a reason. :-).

Signed,

ART UNDONE

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