Thank You, Next.

I think it’s important to note that some things are irreplaceable. Without them, things will just not be the same. No matter if there are millions of that one thing, you won’t ever be able to get that special one you once you had back. And this fact sucks. It sucks so bad that you may cry. You may cry and always compare everything else to what once was, but you eventually have to face reality. With reality, you may have to mourn or celebrate the experience or object, but eventually, you have to let go of the attachment and find a way to move forward. It’s not easy, but necessary to make room for a new thing. Not the same thing, but a new thing. A new normal.

So, today, I’m mourning the loss of a pinnacle item in my creative life, my beloved laptop. The way I’m going to do that is to share all the memories I had with it before I let it go. This may be absolutely too personal, but I need to thank it and I decided I would share in its celebration because there would be nothing worse than making my creative being suffer because of a series of unfortunate events.

Instead, my laptop would want me to find a way to post anyways and continue the creative and educational legacy we started from the day we met. So, before I start with my mourning/celebration process, I’d like to credit Tidying Up by Marie Kondo because watching her show will hopefully help me get this closure… although I can’t hug my laptop and hold it close….*Goes to cry for a second*. Also, I’m totally fine with being called dramatic for my processes. HOWEVER, I’ll always live in my truth, no matter how extra it may seem. Tuh! I’d also like to note that about a year ago when I blogged about a hard reset, this is NOT what I meant… Anywho, let’s get started…

  • First and Foremost, thank you for being a reliable resource for me to get my thoughts out when physically writing wouldn’t do the trick.
  • Thank you for the countless amount of hours we spent together watching The Office.
  • Thank you for housing thousands upon thousands of my beloved pictures that I’m going to miss so dearly. My Pictures :-(.
  • Thank you for helping me graduate from college!
  • Thank you for helping me learn Spanish in order to go to Spain, TWICE!
  • Thank you for being with me on late nights when I was looking and searching for my first internships and jobs.
  • Thank you for always having my playlists ready to go on Spotify.
  • Thank you for being a getaway.
  • Thank you for handling my multi-tabs when my head was all over the place and I couldn’t decide what I wanted to do next.
  • Thank you for being there for me on nights I couldn’t sleep and decided to start a new project instead.
  • Thank you for holding some of my most precious thoughts and allowing me a blank canvas to create as I pleased.
  • Thank you for being a tool that was utilized in my personal and professional growth.
  • Thank you for always waiting to die until I found the charger.
  • Thank you for being a superior computer that allowed me to be an efficient remote worker when needed.
  • Thank you for being an encyclopedia of some of my most cherished moments…
  • Thank you for teaching me an invaluable lesson because of your tragic loss…
  • Thank you for lasting as long as you did, especially when sometimes I didn’t take care of you as well as I should have.

So, yeah, thank you Laptop. I’ll miss you and all the memories you held dearly. Maybe the universe will have you return to me unscathed. However, if that should not be in our future, thank you for everything and I promise to make sure I take care of my new bae better and back up everything…. Later gator.

Love,

Art Undone.

The Free Breakfast Podcast | Episode 2 | Welp, There Goes 2018!

Free Breakfast - Option 1

This episode we talk about how crazy, beautiful and hectic our 2018 year was. We learned a lot and we’re ready to talk about it!

Join in on the fun and hashtag us! #FreeBreakfastPod🍳

Free Breakfast Podcast Episodes

The Free Breakfast Podcast is free, fun and fulfilling conversations between a granddaughter and her grandmother. We’ll discuss topics such as boundaries, pet peeves and so much more. No matter your age, we believe you can get something worthwhile from the Free Breakfast Podcast. We hope you all are ready for a good time because we are!

 

Falling Back In Love at Barnes & Noble

copy of copy of copy of copy of copy of instagram post – untitled design

While sitting at a table in Barnes & Noble reading “Spark Joy” by Marie Kondo, I hear my phone buzz and get the text that the book I just ordered online for pickup in order to save $3.00 is now ready. I pick up my new book and start heading towards the door. I can’t help but remember the one time I was practically running out of this exact same store to make sure no one saw me crying.

I was fresh out off a breakup and needed to get out of the house and decided that re-igniting my passion for reading would help me through the process. It sounded like a brilliant idea at the time. So, there I was searching for a literary getaway on the brink of tears. I searched for 30 minutes before the tears in my eyes got too heavy to soak back up. So, deciding I wouldn’t go home empty-handed, I picked a book that slightly looked entertaining and was also on Oprah’s booklist. I just knew I couldn’t go wrong with something OPRAH suggested. I purchased the book in a hurry and practically ran to my car to listen to Cranes in the Sky and cry my way home.

This story isn’t about the breakup. It’s more so about the fact that I picked a completely crappy book that I could never finish and to this day I’ll never understand how, even in my state of bewilderment, picked such an un-inspiring, boring book. Listen, I tried. I really did. But, I’m just going to say just like my judgment was off with selecting that book, Oprah’s was too when she put it on her list. Sorry Oprah, still love you girl.

The reason this story came up today was that as I was leaving Barnes & Noble tonight I was filled with nothing but joy. I even stopped by the cookie store in celebration for the new book I was about to crack open. Yes, I told myself I deserved a cookie for buying a new book. Don’t judge me.

The thing is that I’m un-ashamed/ashamed to admit is that prior to my near B&N breakdown, I hadn’t bought a book to read for leisure in years. I listened to some Audible books, but I never took the opportunity to dive into a traditional, good ole’ paperback book. Up until college, I was a reading machine. I wouldn’t sleep to read. I would lose myself in stories for hours. My fingers would go numb and I would just shake it off and keep on going. It was wonderful. But, unfortunately, I had lost that.

So, when everything seemed to go haywire, I tried to go back to the books and find a getaway. I wanted to be anywhere except where I was. It was running away from something to get to books instead of running to books for the pure joy of reading. Lucky me, I picked one of the worst books in the bunch and my little book vacation would be cut very short. I wouldn’t get the getaway I wanted. Instead, I had to face reality and figure some things out. I was always meant to come back to books, but not like that. It wasn’t fair to me or the books I would be consuming.

Here I am now… Ready to wrap this up to run to my new book, a book I spent about an hour finding in Barnes & Noble where the only place I was running to was a table to get started. My re-ignited love for books feels pure and organic. Being able to consume the pages with a clear palette and conscious knowing that these books were picked out of peak interest, not desperation.

So, you could say that what I’m getting at is that life has a way of coming full-circle. No, I’ll never pick up that god-awful book again, but I’ll always go into that Barnes & Noble and see it as a symbolic place of growth. I’ll also walk in there and thank it for being a place where I regained my love for books again. I might need to thank the library too because my budget says I’ll need to be there soon too. Yikes.

Signed,

Art Undone

The Free Breakfast Podcast | Episode 1

Free Breakfast - Option 1

This episode we explore boundaries, what they mean to us, how do we navigate them and how do we communicate them to people close to us.

Join in on the fun and hashtag us! #FreeBreakfastPod🍳

The Free Breakfast Podcast is free, fun and fulfilling conversations between a granddaughter and her grandmother. We’ll discuss topics such as boundaries, pet peeves and so much more. No matter your age, we believe you can get something worthwhile from the Free Breakfast Podcast. We hope you all are ready for a good time because we are!

 

Welp, This Didn’t Go As Planned.

Instagram Post – Welp This Didn't Go As Planned.

Last year, I attempted to prepare myself and everyone else for 2018. I thought I was ready for the new year with 10 ART Lessons for the upcoming year. I just knew I had this down-packed. The thing is that the lessons were good. They made sense and I was happy to share. I don’t regret it at all. However, life has a way of life-ing and 2018 through your girl for a LOOP! Whew Chill-lay!

Since producing the 10 ART Lessons, I’ve definitely re-visited them and, in some instances, they have helped, in others not so much. Why? Because this year has been crazy and no amount of reading or writing could prepare me for what I experience. Although he is cancelled in my book, I can say it was a beautiful, dark, twisted fantasy. From deaths to health issues and bizarre accidents, I could not prepare for what I’ve never experienced.

So, now to experience this year, I know I won’t have every tool I’ll need to get through the next year. What I’ll have is me. I have to have the confidence in myself and my ability to overcome whatever obstacles come my way. This year taught me just how strong I am. I’m more confident than ever to go into this next year for a few reasons: 1.) I know what I want 2.) I know I have what it takes to get it. I know life will life but I also know Art will Art. I’m not arrogant in the least bit. But for once, I really really believe in myself and my dreams and visions. I need to make some things happen. I will make some things happen. In order to do that, I’ve already started to make this transition a little easier by starting my 2019 earlier. Everything I want to do and feel in 2019, I’ve started in the month of December. I’m not waiting. Another way I want to help myself, because my memory can be really bad at times, is to write down what I’ve learned this year. I probably won’t remember everything but writing it down will help me and maybe it could possibly help you too.

  • Listen to your body. If you are still enough, your body will tell you what it needs. If you listen and your body is still not responding like you want it to, don’t be afraid to get professional medical help. Also, be consistent and unwavering if you know something is wrong. Don’t let anyone try to tell you that you’re overreacting.
  • Your worth isn’t connected to your work. Stop feeling useless and worthless because you can’t produce work. It’s okay to sit out and take a break. Never forget your purpose but by all means do what you need to do to be okay before you push yourself to produce just to feel like you are valuable or worthy.
  • Just being here is enough. Sometimes we’re just here and that’s it. Life is hard so the fact that you are here is something to be proud of.
  • The more you say yes to everyone else, the more you say no to yourself. Say yes to yourself more. It’s okay to be selfish with your time, mental space and body.
  • Let yourself feel. Don’t continue to bottle up your feels. Allow yourself to feel whatever you need to feel completely. If you continue to bottle them up, they’ll come out sooner or later. It’s okay to let them out. It’s going to be uncomfortable ASF, but worth it. It’s really a cleansing process.
  • Do what makes you feel free. If you find yourself always tensing up and never feeling freedom, it’s time to do so. Painting makes me feel free. Dancing makes me feel free. Find what makes you feel free and do as much as you can. Life already has so many rules, it’s good to get outside of your head, break any mental barriers and life a free and fulfilling life.
  • Don’t torture yourself with hypothesis. What ifs are the devil! Let them go and live in what is. Unless you are willing to put those hypothesis to the test, LET. THEM. Go! You’re just torturing yourself for the hell of it.
  • Be quiet enough to listen to yourself. Noise has a great way of ridding you of much-needed you time. Sometimes you’re doing things you don’t even like just because you haven’t taken the time to process your feelings. Please listen to yourself.
  • Take 30 seconds to think through any snap-decisions. Yes, this sounds like common sense, but if you just take out 30 seconds to think through snap decisions you can save yourself time, money and resources that you may regret utilizing because of quick decisions.
  • Pay attention to people’s actions more than their words. The truth is in the action, not the words.
  • No one owes you anything so be appreciative of those who still decide to be there for you.
  • Say less, Do more. Stop looking for validation and congratulations on things you haven’t even done yet. You just announce things and once you get the instant gratification, it takes away the incentive to get the actual thing done. Just do it.
  • No one should make you feel bad for doing what’s best for you.
  • Don’t be so hard on yourself for how you react to things you’ve never experienced before.
  • Love on yourself, especially when you aren’t at your best. You’ll need all that love. Shower yourself with it.
  • Stop using “thinking” as an excuse not to be “doing”. Also known as procrastinating.
  • You can’t be good if your health isn’t good. Take care of yourself.
  • Smile in the mirror every single day before you go out into the world.
  • A good dream that is bad for you is still a nightmare.

It’s so much more and I’ll probably add more later. I need to get this out though. Why? Idk, but I need to release it so here it is.

I love you and I hope you smile a lot this year and many years to come.

Signed,

ART still Undone but Better.

 

You’re Already At Your After

Copy of Copy of Copy of Copy of Instagram Post – Untitled Design

You’re not who you were a year ago. You got through some things that you thought would take you down. You have accomplished more than you thought you would. You are at after. You’re not the same as before.

Think about it. Think about how much you’ve changed mentally or emotionally. Are you able to see the change? Do you process information differently? Do you think before you do now? I know somewhere between the more experiences you’ve had, that you’ve made some progress. It may not be drastic, it could be incremental, yet, it still is change.

You are at a point where it is okay to acknowledge that change. Little by little you’re doing something better. You’re becoming a better version of yourself.

You are living your best life means you are making the best out of every situation that life throws at you. That means every step you take forward is the best version of yourself you’ve ever seen.

I’m so proud of you! I’m so proud of you acknowledging your growth. Your after has arrived, so enjoy it and move forward again. How amazing is it to know that you are constantly getting better with time and experience?

Keep going, I’m rooting for you.

Love,

ART Undone

Why the Hell Can’t I Get Off Of Social Media?

Copy of Copy of Copy of Instagram Post – Untitled Design

Listen Linda! Linda! Listen! I was/have been going through it with social media this year and it’s NOT something I want to admit. However, I’ve already told ya’ll that I’m undone and this is part of my unpretty truth. I’m happy to say I am much better now, but the fact remains the same that it can happen to anyone and I’m just going to be real enough to admit it. It came to the point where I had to ask myself, “Why the hell can’t I get off of Social Media?”. These are some of my findings and they aren’t cute, but here we are.

You can’t mind your own business.

Social Media is about being social. Yes, liking, viewing, and sharing is a form of actively being in a social space. Let’s be honest, you do this because it takes you away from minding your own business. You now have a reason to leave all your problems or tasks behind and you can just focus on absolutely nothing that concerns you. It’s easy. It’s accessible. It’s free. Truth is, not minding your own business costs you something more valuable than money, time; Time that you can’t get back because you couldn’t mind your own business.

You don’t have your own business to mind.

You can’t mind your own business if you don’t have any. Let’s be honest, a lot of our lives can be boring at times. Instead of making life something we would be proud of, we decide that other people’s lives are more interesting to focus on. Of course, when you’re on autopilot, you have more time to check out the views and focus on everyone else but you.

You’re addicted.

Yes, addicted. People get addicted to social media and sometimes they aren’t even consuming the information. It’s a time suck and it’s easy to get stuck just scrolling to scroll, taking in mostly useless information just because it is available to us. If you are addicted, it’s probably harder than ever to put your phone down with the fear that you MIGHT miss something important. Instead of deciding to live your life, you’d rather be an audience member of someone else’s show.

It makes you happy

You laugh. You cry. You share. You comment. You retweet. You feel a part of the crowd. Social media brings happiness to a lot of people. It’s original intent was to connect people…i.e. be “social”.

Other/Miscellaneous

So, have you identified your problem of why you can’t get off of social media? If not, take some time to think about the feelings it gives you. What are you doing when you decide you have to check your phone? What are you trying to stop doing when you pick up your phone?  Before you can find a solution, you have to find the problem.

Solutions?

For once, I’m not going to give you the answer because honestly, it’s different for everyone depending on the day and I don’t know if I have them… but good news! You have clicked this blog and realized you have a problem (or that I have a problem and you’re laughing at me right now). I’m in the same boat, I realize I have a problem and I know there must be a solution. So, here’s what I’ve been doing/trying to do:

  • Find something to do! Ever since I’ve been busy working on my own projects, social media has become less important, unless it directly deals with my projects. It’s amazing what happens when you have your own business to mind.
  • Take away the ease of access from the social media apps that I spend the most time on. Example. I can only access Twitter on my laptop.
  • Limit the amount of time you are on social media with an app. The Space app helps me drastically by sending reminders when I’ve been on social media for too long.
  • Create an alternative, quick access task for you to do to replace the time you spend on social media. I’ve downloaded some game apps, knowledge-based apps, and e-books as alternatives.
  • Go completely cold turkey and delete the apps. You would be amazed at how much time you waste on social media by not getting on it at all. This allows you to have more time to think, including thinking of new things you can do instead of being on social media.
  • Find a passion project, then put deadlines on it. When you’re focused on something meaningful, the meaning-less matters less
  • Travel… Most countries don’t have data available. You have to live more. (This may just be a selfish plug for traveling. Don’t judge me!)
  • Hide your shortcuts to your apps. While you’re searching for them, you’ll realize how much you don’t actually need it.

To be real, Social media is hard to get rid of, but it’s possible to survive without it. Ask your mom & dad. Don’t worry, you’ll know what you need to know. Your friends will tell you when Beyoncé drops. Stop using social media as a crutch and live more. How about we do it together?

Signed,

ART getting it together

Three Years Later

Copy of Copy of Instagram Post – Untitled Design

I’m currently sitting and waiting for my very dear friend to come out from the back of my alma mater’s  2018 Commencement Ceremony. It’ll be three years since my graduation next week and I can barely remember how it felt to graduate other than almost falling before I got to stage because I was rushing to put on lip gloss at the last minute (Typical Art behavior). So, here I am, taking in what I did over 3 years ago. It feels a little surreal honestly, even after such a long time of being out of school.

It’s quite amazing what the human does without thinking. We eat, laugh, sleep and even graduate without completely conceptualizing the very act of what we’re doing. Our 20’s seem to be about completing a goal and moving to the next thing that we’re supposed to complete without ever actually appreciating what we’ve just completed. It’s like our story always ends in coming soon and never in a reflective time to think about what has already been done. So, here I am, three years later taking in what I should’ve taken in so long ago. I freaking graduated from college and worked my butt off!

It makes me sad to sit here and see people get their rewards for working so hard and realizing that I just saw this day as a stepping stone and not a real prize. I should’ve cherished it more. Instead, I fell into the same trap of trying to figure out what to do next because something done is never enough. It’s always a “next step” because we have to move forward right? But what’s the point of moving forward without celebrating what it took you to get here in the first place?

So, celebrate your wins as they occur. Don’t be afraid to enjoy the now before looking for the next. You’re right here and deserve all your applause. Hell, even ask for more applause if you need to. It’s okay to celebrate. You accomplished something so great, don’t let what’s next diminish that away. No matter what you accomplished, remember YOU completed something. Gas yourself up and enjoy your moment.

gas me up chance the rapper GIF by BET Awards

Signed,

ART Undone

Experience Needed.

Instagram Post – Experience Needed.

I’ve realized that no matter how much you practice scenarios in your mind and no matter how many books you read, it won’t mean crap unless you put it to the test. Woulda, Coulda & Shoulda doesn’t mean anything until you prove it. How do you prove your theories? Experience. You have to practice what you preach. You have to put it to the test. You can think you know what you are going to do and how you are going to react, but none of that matters until you actually put it to the test.

It’s like thinking you want to be a meteorologist but have never been in front of a green screen. You’ve read all the books on what it takes to be one and you feel like that’s what you want to do. You can see it. However, until you actually experience it and test it out, nothing is concrete. Why? FEELINGS. You can’t predict how you will feel about something until you actually experience it. That’s the only way to truly know if that’s really what you want. So you know what that means? You have to take risks. Risks you don’t normally take that may end in failure. You can only know if you will succeed or fail if you try. That’s it.

I’ve found myself in a predicament that I didn’t think I would be in. And it’s making me realize that what I thought I would do, I’m not. Why? FEELINGS! Since going through this process, I’ve realized I need to be more open to listening to my feelings as I’m going through new experiences that I’ve only played in my head. It’s not the same. Experience is needed to know how I feel about certain situations, as well as how I will react with new information. I can’t be so hard on myself for things I’ve never experienced before.

Signed,

ART Undone

Things I’ve Learned About Being A Creative From Beyoncé

untitled design

This year, I’ve been more creatively free than I’ve ever been. This year was also historic for Beyoncé. Having the opportunity to witness Beychella in person, I was inspired to write about the things I’ve learned about being a creative from Beyoncé. Of course, people could (and have) write an entire dissertation on Beyonce and her creativity, I decided to write a quick list of the ones that have inspired me. Enjoy!

mrs. carter beyonce GIF

  • Release content when you’re ready, not when it’s demanded.
  • Regardless of what people want, release what speaks to you and what makes you happy. You can’t please everyone and you shouldn’t try to.

Apathetic Mood GIF

  • Be sensitive about your creations. Don’t allow everyone to have an opinion during your creative process. Remember, you are the creator, this is your work.beyonce fashion GIF
  • Learn the power in silence and let your work speak for itself.
  • Keep a tight circle around you that you can trust to keep your secrets. We don’t do leaks!

beyonce no GIF

  • Stay ready so you don’t have to get ready. You never know who’s looking.           you ready beyonce GIF
  • Tell people what you did, not what you’re doing. Don’t release premature information that’s not solidified. When you decide to show up, make sure you show out.

i've arrived i'm here GIF

  • Don’t be afraid to take chances. Everyone won’t get it, but remember, Quality is quality and THAT is undeniable.
  • It’s none of your business what the other girls are doing or what anybody else thinks of your work if they are not supporting you. You can’t please everyone.

get out gtfo GIF

  • Work your butt off for your craft. Be the best you can be and compete with only yourself. You are the standard that needs to be topped.
  • Be the Beyoncé in your field and let your work speak for itself.

the office beyonce GIF

  • Your bigger supporters may be under the radar. You don’t need people to shout from the rooftops that they support you to know that you made it.
  • Perfecting your craft takes time. As long as you’re growing, you are doing something right. Be unapologetic about your growth.I Aint Sorry Music Video GIF
  • Sometimes you just have to snatch wigs and take no prisoners.beyonce wig snatch GIF
  • Confidence is KEY! Make sure you believe in your work and OWN it.beyonce GIF
  • And lastly, always remember this is your work and you are the boss. Don’t let anyone treat you any less.queen b fashion GIF

Signed,

Art-yoncé 🙂