Accepting Yourself as a Work of Art

Art Undone - Acceptance

I was in the fourth or fifth grade in, ironically, art class when I realized that my initials spelled art. I thought it was super cool that my initials spelled art and of course, I made a big deal out of it for the rest of the class time. But, sometime between that class and college, I forgot about ART. Well, maybe I didn’t forget about my initials being ART, but it didn’t have any significant meaning. During that period, I also never connected to art. I always thought it didn’t make much sense to me. It felt unattainable. I didn’t get it.

So, here I am now, completely embracing Art as a name and as a concept. Yes, the initial reasoning behind this was to have a synonym for my name during my job searching process, BUT it’s turned into so much more. How, because, I, you and we are all pieces of art. The Oxford Dictionary defines art as “The expression or application of human creative skill and imagination, typically in a visual form such as painting or sculpture”, and I’d like to add such as people. Because isn’t part of who we are imagined and manifested?

We create our vision and we paint our lives with action. It doesn’t always turn out exactly how we imagined. Sometimes we draw out the lines. Sometimes we’re abstract paintings that people don’t get because everyone’s used to looking at photorealism. Art is subjective. We are subjective. There are artists who never get their due respect until they’re dead. There’s not one single work of art that every single person in this world loves. But, there’s someone out that loves the “ugliest” painting to ever be made. We are all art. We paint our story.

And just like painting, once the paint is on the canvas, no matter what you do, you can’t ever completely start over. You can re-imagine and re-utilize, but you can’t start over. You just have to take what you have and make it beautiful. Some works of art take longer to “fix” than others, but the most important and essential part of this process is that when you walk away from your piece of art, you should walk away proud. Even if you have to turn, rotate or flip it, you, the artist, should be able to say job well done, even if your art isn’t completely done.

Accepting and loving your art during the entire process.

Every layer matters. Every stroke matters. It doesn’t matter if you like it or not, it is now apart of your journey and it will eventually create and allow you to picture exactly who you are at that moment and time. It may not be ideal, but it is who you are. A part of art and you being art is accepting who you are at every stage of your life, no matter how you feel about it. As you continue to grow, you’ll learn how to turn your mistakes into flowers and your regrets into depth. It’s all about perception. It’s important during your process to be honest with yourself, but also look at the canvas you’re painting as invaluable. Every stroke matters, so do it with passion, determination and intention. It’s okay to not know exactly what you’re painting or doing, but it is important to do it with intention.

Accepting that you are the artist and your canvas is yours.

The day you realize that this life you are painting is yours and there’s an audience of one, the quicker you can start create something that fulfills you and makes you happy. It’s your canvas, so do as you please. Get wild, even reckless. Just know everything will have its place in your story. Just remember this life, this canvas is yours, so make it count in the best way you can.

Signed,

Art Undone

Have you been ghosting yourself?

Art Undone - Ghosting

Note: This was written Pre-Rona, so, as always, take what you need and leave the rest. Take Care of you!


No matter how you feel about ghosting, I think we can all agree to be the person on the receiving end sucks. For those who may not be familiar, ghosting is when a person who has been in contact with another person on a rather consistent basis unexpectedly ceases all communications with that other person, essentially turning into a ‘ghost’. I’ll admit, I’ve been ghosted before by someone and it completely sucked. They were initiating all these future plans and emotions, just for them to go ghost for absolutely no reason. I was shook. I feel like I was even more in my feelings because Issa on Insecure was getting ghosted at the same time. It was too much. Basura.

Back to the point, many people have different definitions of ghosting, but I think the worst part may be the consistent communication with a lack of warning signs that shit is about to go left. Then the next thing you know, you’re at home blaming yourself for all these what-if situations that really had nothing to do with you. However, you’re still ghosted, alone, and trying to figure it all out.

Ghosting can happen in a plethora of situations. From recruiters ghosting you to friends, ghosting happens a lot. However, I don’t think we talk about it enough when we ghost ourselves. Ghost ourselves? Huh? Let me explain….

Just like a person may ghost you because something came up, an old flame popped up with the “wyd big head” text or maybe they just changed their minds about you. Harsh, but it happens. While I don’t feel like we admit it, we do the same thing to ourselves. How many times do we make plans with ourselves? How we’ll write more, take care of ourselves better, create peace within only for us to ghost ourselves because of life, or someone else popped-up. We’ll leave ourselves on ‘read’ for days, weeks, and even months to tend to everyone else and come back to ourselves like nothing happened and we didn’t break all our promises.

We tend not to look at it like this because it seems too harsh or restrictive of the fact that we’re living in an outside world and can’t just focus on ourselves. However, I think we tend to do ourselves a disservice by not acknowledging the relationship with ourselves is just as important, if not more important than any other relationship in our life. We have all this energy to be mad and frustrated with others when they don’t live up to our expectations, but we tend to forget about the commitments we’ve made to ourselves.

I want to be clear, this is not a green light to kick yourself over every missed gym appointment or every journal entry not written. Instead, just as we tend to ask in a relationship, I think it’s important to listen to yourself, your body, and your mind and find ways that allow you not to “ghost’ yourself in the midst of life. It’s okay to acknowledge that you know the next week will be crazy and you’ll have minimal time to fully address all your needs, however, don’t just ghost yourself for an extended amount of time. Be intentional, just as you would hope others would, with your time, expectations, and needs.

Yes, 9 times out of 10, when you return back to yourself, you’ll be there fully ready to accept any attention you can get. However, sometimes when you ghost yourself for such a long time, you forget who you are. You don’t remember who you are coming back to. You forget your needs, your wants. All those things you used to be in sync with that helps you get by, are faded memories. So, if you find yourself ghosting yourself, be intentional on ways to not lose yourself in this loud ass, crazy ass world because it’s so easy to do.

Signed,

Art Undone

The Plight of Positivity | Art Undone

Art Undone- The Plight of Positivity

I’ve always been known as a pretty positive person. I would say that I’ve always described myself as positive and optimistic. Always smiling and strong. Never letting anyone really see my sweat. It was never a role, it just felt like who I was. Little did I know a lot of the positivity was a survival tactic. You don’t have time to be a Debbie downer or sad when shit has to be done. You just have to figure it out and keep it moving. However, as I always say, life has a way of life-ing, and I found myself questioning positive thinking and if it was all a lie.

I got sick. I thought I was going to die. I was ready to give up. I was actually planning how people would find me. Dark, right? Yeah, I know. I couldn’t believe this was me myself. I was so defeated and the only positive I saw was waking up the next morning. Now, no need to worry, I wasn’t actually dying, it just felt like it. I was taking some information my body gave to me and amplified it times 1000 in my mind. It was bad and I didn’t know how to get out of it.

What was even more frustrating to me is that I felt like this wasn’t me. I wasn’t a negative Nancy. I was a positive sunflower so who the hell was this girl preparing for her death? In the words of the undeniably talented icon, Mariah Carey, “I didn’t know her”. All I knew was I didn’t like who I was and all I wanted to do was get back to positive rainbows and sunrays because this was for the birds.

So, positivity is great right? Of course, but not when it’s a shield to protect you from your real feelings. When I got sick, all I could do was deal with all those thoughts I had been suppressing for years. I felt so defeated. There was only the end and I just wanted to be prepared for the worst instead of ever thinking there could be a happy ending. I went in the complete opposite direction.

I hated the fact that this version of me existed. She wasn’t supposed to be like this. I felt like a complete fraud. Was being positive a scam? Was I a scam? I was going through it.

So, what happened next? I went to therapy because what else could I do? I needed help and I couldn’t figure it out alone.

After many sessions and much-needed help, I realized that me in my raw, negative form was just as much a part of me as a person as the positive version of myself. It didn’t mean I had to like it, it just meant I had to acknowledge it. Once I was able to acknowledge that version of myself, I was able to work on her. It didn’t mean she would ever go completely away, but I could work with her better.

The plight of positivity is the dismissal of everything else that doesn’t fit into that category. It can be just as lethal as the plight of negativity. I had to disconnect from my ultra-positive social media followers and holistically accept myself for who I was at that moment. It wasn’t easy but worth it. I’m still working on all of this, but I wanted to share my current relationship with positivity and myself. Here are a few takeaways as well:

  • You should strive to find a silver lining when it’s available but know that when you dismiss all things negative just to get there, those same things have a way of coming back around in the worst way.
  • It’s okay to feel negative feelings and let them out. It’s okay to not always be positive. That doesn’t make you less strong. It’s commendable to acknowledge all your thoughts and place them as you need in order to be okay.
  • Sometimes in order to survive, we do what will get us through the best. That may mean ignoring every bad thing in your life and only focusing on the positives. Just know that you shouldn’t always be in a flight or fight mode.
  • You must be willing to accept yourself for exactly who you are in order to start changing in any way you deem necessary. Just because you don’t like a certain part of yourself, doesn’t mean it’s not you. You can always learn to manage or fix it as much as you can but be willing to accept yourself as you are and that will make the work a lot easier.
  • Always, always give yourself room to breathe. Any internal work you do is not going to be easy. You’re putting yourself to a test of exposing the true you. It’s okay to just be as much as it is to grind towards your internal goals.
  • There’s always work to be done, so it’s also okay to be content in being undone.

Signed,

Art stay Undone.

I Didn’t Lie This Time! | Art Undone

Didnt Lie - Aug 1

Yes, this is the energy we are coming in with because it is the truth! I didn’t lie this time. I didn’t lie to myself or anyone else. I kept a promise and it feels really good to say that I actually did it! It feels even better when it feels like I’ve lied to myself for such a long time. Let me explain…

explain tv land GIF by YoungerTV

Ever since I graduated from college, I’ve had a plan. I was going to work for two years then go to graduate school, specifically at the University of Pennsylvania. It had been my dream school in undergrad, but afraid to transfer, I decided to defer the dream instead and attend for graduate school. I was going to go to an amazingly elite graduate program, for FREE. That was it. That was the entire plan. After that? Well, of course, get a good-paying job. Doing what exactly? Didn’t matter. I just needed to get into grad school and say it was all paid for.

So, what did I do to make this happen? Well, I took the GMAT twice and failed miserably twice. I then postponed taking the third test I bought THREE times before I finally got a “refund” after I realized it wasn’t going to happen.

sad doctor who GIF

Me to all my wasted money

Let me tell you, that was an anxiety-induced time in my life. I was telling all my friends how I was “studying” so hard for the GMAT to get into grad school, while privately having this internal battle inside that made me keep on saying myself “why?”. Why did I want to go to grad school? Why couldn’t I shut up about it? Why couldn’t I stop lying about really studying? Why couldn’t I focus?

over it no GIF by The Daily Show with Trevor Noah

With so many unanswered whys, came even more lies. So, why the hell was I lying so much about grad school? Well, honestly that shit sounded so good. It gave me the next step. It gave me a purpose, a pathway. It also gave me a great acting role. Acting you say? So, who was the audience? The audience was truly me. Every time I could convince someone to believe in my “dream”, I was one step closer to believing it myself. It was a great show, but afterwards, there wouldn’t be an applause because when the curtains closed, I had to face myself and the truth always comes out. I didn’t want grad school. I just liked the fake audience applause it generated. I didn’t want to really lie. I just appreciated the fact that people believed in me. So, yes, I did lie, but this time I didn’t, and it feels so good.

On July 17, 2018, walking down W Montrose street in Chicago to go to get breakfast at a bagel shop, I stopped to take a selfie to commemorate a promise I knew I would keep. That day I decided I was going to move to Chicago. It felt right. It felt like home. It felt like the truth. I didn’t know exactly when I would get there, but I knew that it would be. In some ways, I don’t know how it all happened, but I can say I didn’t lie. Two weeks short of a year from that day, I’m sitting in my bed, a street over from W Montrose, in Chicago with all my belongings, gladly able to say that I didn’t lie this time and I kept my promise. Oh, what a feeling this is.

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Signed,

Art Simply Undone.

Dear ART at 26

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Dear Art at 26,

Whew, Chil-lay! 25 did NOT go as planned in more ways than one. But, you made it here and you DESERVE to be here. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to smile. You deserve to thrive. Why? Because with all that life has thrown you this past year, you’ve still managed to find the silver lining in a lot of crazy experiences. Also, you deserve everything just for simply existing. That’s one new lesson that you’ve definitely learned this past year. Surviving IS doing something. It takes courage to just make it through the day when everything and everyone seems to just not get it. You survived 25 and I’m so proud of you for that because at times it did not seem like the easiest thing to do.

I don’t know if we would call this stage “getting old” or “shit happens”, but a lot of all that has happened, and it was A. Lot! Life will life. Don’t forget that. Also, don’t forget that Art will make Art out of the materials she is given. It wasn’t and won’t always be easy but it’s necessary. It is essential that you don’t forget who you are because of what has happened in your life. It is important to remember that while you will change in the coming years, your core essence still remains the same and always get back to her when you feel like you have lost your way.

So, yeah, as much as we thought we grew from 24 to 25, 25 to 26 kind of took the cake. We’re not in competition or nothing, but 25 showed out with the tests and lessons thrown our way. But, made it from the bottom, now we’re halfway there! Whatever there is… So with all that growing, please, please, please find ways to document, document, document! Because you WILL need reference materials as you continue to go through life. Think of it as your personal life cheat sheet J.

Oh, yeah, that thing you do where you find little pockets of time and space to be selfish, even in the times of storm, continue to do that. You’ll need that. You’ll need those moments of clarity and solace to be able to operate effectively. This year has been a little more bearable because of those moments of selfishness. You can’t take care of everyone else if you’re not taking care of yourself.

That brings of a very great point… Trust. Your. Growth. You’ve come very far. You have to trust who you are now. You’ve worked hard to get here and it’s important not to revert back because you continue to look back. I know it’s easier said than done, but while we appreciate who you once were, it’s time to celebrate who you are now and where you are going. Just because you may go through a period where you aren’t actively moving forward (Because of life), doesn’t mean you are going backward. You have to trust your growth more than that.

Give yourself space to think AND listen. Sometimes your body is simply trying to talk to you, but if you don’t have the ear to hear, you can miss out on some important information. That also brings me to an important point that you should never forget. Your peace of mind is PRICELESS. If something doesn’t feel right, it is better to be safe than sorry. You know when something is not right. Always be your strongest advocate and make sure you keep records of everything. You never know when you may need them.

Don’t forget that there are people waiting for you to let them in. You don’t always have to be the strong one. You have more support than you know if you’d allow yourself to be open enough to accept. I know you and I know you won’t even go overboard (It’s not our style).

This year has been crazy, but it’s felt good in a lot of ways. I want you to know that God has you, your family has you, your friends have you and most importantly, you have you. You are on a winning team. You are the winning team. I can’t tell you what to expect this next ART year, but I can tell you that I have full confidence in your ability to make it through and doing a great fucking job because I believe in you.

Remember just how much you rose to the occasion this year. Honestly, you showed out. The growth jumped out! It wasn’t easy, but you found a way and made it work. A resourceful queen! I’m so very proud of you for everything you’ve done.

Also knowing when to ask for help and when to make it on your own. That’s a gift to know yourself that well. It’s a blessing. Keep on using your wisdom in those situations.

Just because this year wasn’t the easiest, doesn’t mean you have to have a tainted idea of this next year. Instead, I want you to be hopeful. Careful, but hopeful. This year will manifest greatly.

One big takeaway I can’t Thank God enough for you going into a new ART year is the vision! You found out what it feels like to really want something and that’s a beautiful thing. This year Will Be the year a lot of your hard work pays off. The vision is clear and what is yours, is yours. You know this all feels different and it’s a blessing to be able to pass the baton to someone so ready for all these blessings ready to rain on you.

So, go into this new ART year with great expectations, an open mind, determination, graciousness, faith and love.

I love you soo much.

P.S. Back-up EVERYTHING!

Love,

Art at 25

Thank You, Next.

I think it’s important to note that some things are irreplaceable. Without them, things will just not be the same. No matter if there are millions of that one thing, you won’t ever be able to get that special one you once you had back. And this fact sucks. It sucks so bad that you may cry. You may cry and always compare everything else to what once was, but you eventually have to face reality. With reality, you may have to mourn or celebrate the experience or object, but eventually, you have to let go of the attachment and find a way to move forward. It’s not easy, but necessary to make room for a new thing. Not the same thing, but a new thing. A new normal.

So, today, I’m mourning the loss of a pinnacle item in my creative life, my beloved laptop. The way I’m going to do that is to share all the memories I had with it before I let it go. This may be absolutely too personal, but I need to thank it and I decided I would share in its celebration because there would be nothing worse than making my creative being suffer because of a series of unfortunate events.

Instead, my laptop would want me to find a way to post anyways and continue the creative and educational legacy we started from the day we met. So, before I start with my mourning/celebration process, I’d like to credit Tidying Up by Marie Kondo because watching her show will hopefully help me get this closure… although I can’t hug my laptop and hold it close….*Goes to cry for a second*. Also, I’m totally fine with being called dramatic for my processes. HOWEVER, I’ll always live in my truth, no matter how extra it may seem. Tuh! I’d also like to note that about a year ago when I blogged about a hard reset, this is NOT what I meant… Anywho, let’s get started…

  • First and Foremost, thank you for being a reliable resource for me to get my thoughts out when physically writing wouldn’t do the trick.
  • Thank you for the countless amount of hours we spent together watching The Office.
  • Thank you for housing thousands upon thousands of my beloved pictures that I’m going to miss so dearly. My Pictures :-(.
  • Thank you for helping me graduate from college!
  • Thank you for helping me learn Spanish in order to go to Spain, TWICE!
  • Thank you for being with me on late nights when I was looking and searching for my first internships and jobs.
  • Thank you for always having my playlists ready to go on Spotify.
  • Thank you for being a getaway.
  • Thank you for handling my multi-tabs when my head was all over the place and I couldn’t decide what I wanted to do next.
  • Thank you for being there for me on nights I couldn’t sleep and decided to start a new project instead.
  • Thank you for holding some of my most precious thoughts and allowing me a blank canvas to create as I pleased.
  • Thank you for being a tool that was utilized in my personal and professional growth.
  • Thank you for always waiting to die until I found the charger.
  • Thank you for being a superior computer that allowed me to be an efficient remote worker when needed.
  • Thank you for being an encyclopedia of some of my most cherished moments…
  • Thank you for teaching me an invaluable lesson because of your tragic loss…
  • Thank you for lasting as long as you did, especially when sometimes I didn’t take care of you as well as I should have.

So, yeah, thank you Laptop. I’ll miss you and all the memories you held dearly. Maybe the universe will have you return to me unscathed. However, if that should not be in our future, thank you for everything and I promise to make sure I take care of my new bae better and back up everything…. Later gator.

Love,

Art Undone.

Welp, This Didn’t Go As Planned.

Instagram Post – Welp This Didn't Go As Planned.

Last year, I attempted to prepare myself and everyone else for 2018. I thought I was ready for the new year with 10 ART Lessons for the upcoming year. I just knew I had this down-packed. The thing is that the lessons were good. They made sense and I was happy to share. I don’t regret it at all. However, life has a way of life-ing and 2018 through your girl for a LOOP! Whew Chill-lay!

Since producing the 10 ART Lessons, I’ve definitely re-visited them and, in some instances, they have helped, in others not so much. Why? Because this year has been crazy and no amount of reading or writing could prepare me for what I experience. Although he is cancelled in my book, I can say it was a beautiful, dark, twisted fantasy. From deaths to health issues and bizarre accidents, I could not prepare for what I’ve never experienced.

So, now to experience this year, I know I won’t have every tool I’ll need to get through the next year. What I’ll have is me. I have to have the confidence in myself and my ability to overcome whatever obstacles come my way. This year taught me just how strong I am. I’m more confident than ever to go into this next year for a few reasons: 1.) I know what I want 2.) I know I have what it takes to get it. I know life will life but I also know Art will Art. I’m not arrogant in the least bit. But for once, I really really believe in myself and my dreams and visions. I need to make some things happen. I will make some things happen. In order to do that, I’ve already started to make this transition a little easier by starting my 2019 earlier. Everything I want to do and feel in 2019, I’ve started in the month of December. I’m not waiting. Another way I want to help myself, because my memory can be really bad at times, is to write down what I’ve learned this year. I probably won’t remember everything but writing it down will help me and maybe it could possibly help you too.

  • Listen to your body. If you are still enough, your body will tell you what it needs. If you listen and your body is still not responding like you want it to, don’t be afraid to get professional medical help. Also, be consistent and unwavering if you know something is wrong. Don’t let anyone try to tell you that you’re overreacting.
  • Your worth isn’t connected to your work. Stop feeling useless and worthless because you can’t produce work. It’s okay to sit out and take a break. Never forget your purpose but by all means do what you need to do to be okay before you push yourself to produce just to feel like you are valuable or worthy.
  • Just being here is enough. Sometimes we’re just here and that’s it. Life is hard so the fact that you are here is something to be proud of.
  • The more you say yes to everyone else, the more you say no to yourself. Say yes to yourself more. It’s okay to be selfish with your time, mental space and body.
  • Let yourself feel. Don’t continue to bottle up your feels. Allow yourself to feel whatever you need to feel completely. If you continue to bottle them up, they’ll come out sooner or later. It’s okay to let them out. It’s going to be uncomfortable ASF, but worth it. It’s really a cleansing process.
  • Do what makes you feel free. If you find yourself always tensing up and never feeling freedom, it’s time to do so. Painting makes me feel free. Dancing makes me feel free. Find what makes you feel free and do as much as you can. Life already has so many rules, it’s good to get outside of your head, break any mental barriers and life a free and fulfilling life.
  • Don’t torture yourself with hypothesis. What ifs are the devil! Let them go and live in what is. Unless you are willing to put those hypothesis to the test, LET. THEM. Go! You’re just torturing yourself for the hell of it.
  • Be quiet enough to listen to yourself. Noise has a great way of ridding you of much-needed you time. Sometimes you’re doing things you don’t even like just because you haven’t taken the time to process your feelings. Please listen to yourself.
  • Take 30 seconds to think through any snap-decisions. Yes, this sounds like common sense, but if you just take out 30 seconds to think through snap decisions you can save yourself time, money and resources that you may regret utilizing because of quick decisions.
  • Pay attention to people’s actions more than their words. The truth is in the action, not the words.
  • No one owes you anything so be appreciative of those who still decide to be there for you.
  • Say less, Do more. Stop looking for validation and congratulations on things you haven’t even done yet. You just announce things and once you get the instant gratification, it takes away the incentive to get the actual thing done. Just do it.
  • No one should make you feel bad for doing what’s best for you.
  • Don’t be so hard on yourself for how you react to things you’ve never experienced before.
  • Love on yourself, especially when you aren’t at your best. You’ll need all that love. Shower yourself with it.
  • Stop using “thinking” as an excuse not to be “doing”. Also known as procrastinating.
  • You can’t be good if your health isn’t good. Take care of yourself.
  • Smile in the mirror every single day before you go out into the world.
  • A good dream that is bad for you is still a nightmare.

It’s so much more and I’ll probably add more later. I need to get this out though. Why? Idk, but I need to release it so here it is.

I love you and I hope you smile a lot this year and many years to come.

Signed,

ART still Undone but Better.

 

You’re Already At Your After

Copy of Copy of Copy of Copy of Instagram Post – Untitled Design

You’re not who you were a year ago. You got through some things that you thought would take you down. You have accomplished more than you thought you would. You are at after. You’re not the same as before.

Think about it. Think about how much you’ve changed mentally or emotionally. Are you able to see the change? Do you process information differently? Do you think before you do now? I know somewhere between the more experiences you’ve had, that you’ve made some progress. It may not be drastic, it could be incremental, yet, it still is change.

You are at a point where it is okay to acknowledge that change. Little by little you’re doing something better. You’re becoming a better version of yourself.

You are living your best life means you are making the best out of every situation that life throws at you. That means every step you take forward is the best version of yourself you’ve ever seen.

I’m so proud of you! I’m so proud of you acknowledging your growth. Your after has arrived, so enjoy it and move forward again. How amazing is it to know that you are constantly getting better with time and experience?

Keep going, I’m rooting for you.

Love,

ART Undone

Three Years Later

Copy of Copy of Instagram Post – Untitled Design

I’m currently sitting and waiting for my very dear friend to come out from the back of my alma mater’s  2018 Commencement Ceremony. It’ll be three years since my graduation next week and I can barely remember how it felt to graduate other than almost falling before I got to stage because I was rushing to put on lip gloss at the last minute (Typical Art behavior). So, here I am, taking in what I did over 3 years ago. It feels a little surreal honestly, even after such a long time of being out of school.

It’s quite amazing what the human does without thinking. We eat, laugh, sleep and even graduate without completely conceptualizing the very act of what we’re doing. Our 20’s seem to be about completing a goal and moving to the next thing that we’re supposed to complete without ever actually appreciating what we’ve just completed. It’s like our story always ends in coming soon and never in a reflective time to think about what has already been done. So, here I am, three years later taking in what I should’ve taken in so long ago. I freaking graduated from college and worked my butt off!

It makes me sad to sit here and see people get their rewards for working so hard and realizing that I just saw this day as a stepping stone and not a real prize. I should’ve cherished it more. Instead, I fell into the same trap of trying to figure out what to do next because something done is never enough. It’s always a “next step” because we have to move forward right? But what’s the point of moving forward without celebrating what it took you to get here in the first place?

So, celebrate your wins as they occur. Don’t be afraid to enjoy the now before looking for the next. You’re right here and deserve all your applause. Hell, even ask for more applause if you need to. It’s okay to celebrate. You accomplished something so great, don’t let what’s next diminish that away. No matter what you accomplished, remember YOU completed something. Gas yourself up and enjoy your moment.

gas me up chance the rapper GIF by BET Awards

Signed,

ART Undone

Experience Needed.

Instagram Post – Experience Needed.

I’ve realized that no matter how much you practice scenarios in your mind and no matter how many books you read, it won’t mean crap unless you put it to the test. Woulda, Coulda & Shoulda doesn’t mean anything until you prove it. How do you prove your theories? Experience. You have to practice what you preach. You have to put it to the test. You can think you know what you are going to do and how you are going to react, but none of that matters until you actually put it to the test.

It’s like thinking you want to be a meteorologist but have never been in front of a green screen. You’ve read all the books on what it takes to be one and you feel like that’s what you want to do. You can see it. However, until you actually experience it and test it out, nothing is concrete. Why? FEELINGS. You can’t predict how you will feel about something until you actually experience it. That’s the only way to truly know if that’s really what you want. So you know what that means? You have to take risks. Risks you don’t normally take that may end in failure. You can only know if you will succeed or fail if you try. That’s it.

I’ve found myself in a predicament that I didn’t think I would be in. And it’s making me realize that what I thought I would do, I’m not. Why? FEELINGS! Since going through this process, I’ve realized I need to be more open to listening to my feelings as I’m going through new experiences that I’ve only played in my head. It’s not the same. Experience is needed to know how I feel about certain situations, as well as how I will react with new information. I can’t be so hard on myself for things I’ve never experienced before.

Signed,

ART Undone