Undone

Undone. We are all undone to a certain extent. Some hide it better than others, but this isn’t about hiding. Here you will find more personal content in the form of random thoughts, poems, rants and unsolicited life lessons in various forms. 


I don’t like every picture I take. I don’t look good in every outfit I try on. I also don’t always feel like my prettiest. However, what I do do is wake up every morning and smile in the mirror at my reflection. I find my best angle. I find my best light. I continually and consistently work on living my best life.


I love you.
I love you when you fail.
I love you when you excel.
I love you when you cry.
I love you when you pry.
I love you regardless.
I love you without ends.
I love you from all I have within.


I’m so good at hiding stuff, it scares me. The ability to bury feelings and emotions so deep, I lose it from myself. I hide my feelings from myself. I’m a fucking magician. Disappearing acts are my specialty. Disregarding my truth to hide it from you. Not to spare your feelings, but my own. I’m strong to a fault. It may be my own fault, but who do I tell? No one seems right. No one seems like me. I can tell myself and not worry about the side effects. I can bear my lows and probably yours too. I’m too good at hiding things. I’m lost inside of myself. I want to feel, but don’t know how. I’m so used to be strong that anything else seems weak.


Joy is my drug of choice.
I’ll gladly overdose.


I’m feeling a little inadequate today.
I have a long way to go and I don’t know if I’m ready.
I need to reset, rejuvenate, re-center and restart.
It’s okay to not have it together as long as you realize that you need to get it together.


I’m starting to feel the weight of it all.
I know that I can carry it.
I know that I will make it through.
It’s just getting through this rain that seems a little difficult.


I’m so blessed to be loved.
I’m so loved to be blessed.
To love and be loved.
To love and give love.
Joy fills my heart.
My heart feels joy.


It’s okay to cry.
It’s okay to sit in a dark room and let yourself feel every emotion possible.
It’s okay to not be okay.
It’s okay to release everything that is built up and do it again.
It’s okay to cry and then need to cry some more.
You don’t have to have all the answers.
You don’t have to apologize for needing time to figure it out.
You aren’t weak because you feel.
You’re strong because you let it out.


My mind is a wonderland

My mind is a wonderland.
It wonders and wonders to find some gems to share.
Most of my thoughts, you’ll never know.
I’ll drop off some trails of existence here and there,
But most of this wonderland is for my enjoyment only.
I’m in my head a lot, but that makes me happy.
It’s a wonderland of twists and turns.
It’s my wonderland.
It has an amazing playlist as well.
I’m in my wonderland and I’m amazed at myself.
I hope to share this with someone one day, but not today.
Not tomorrow or the next, I’m enjoying my wonderland without the ratings.
Maybe one day I’ll let you come and play.


Music.

Music
Music is what keeps me going.
When I’m sad, happy, complacent, it’s music.
It’s always music.
It’s not noise, it’s confirmation, admiration, and consultation.
It’s everything.
Music that makes you feel something you’ve never felt before.
It’s always music. It will always be music.


Undeniable

You need to know that you are undeniable.
You need to know that you are amazing.
You need to know that you are worth it.
Look in the mirror.
Look in the mirror and focus on all the amazing things in front of you.
Hit that pose that accentuates your body in just the right way.
Turn on some music that moves you.
Dance, dance and feel like you are everything and more.
Because you are. You are beautiful. You are undeniable.
You are amazing. You are breathtaking.
You are the epitome of everything that makes you smile.
So look in that mirror. Stay in that mirror and when you leave, remember that mirror.
Because that reflection you see is all you will ever need.


You don’t always have to have an opinion.
In a world full of a’s & b’s, you can just think.
Think without the need for a definite solution.
Having a definite solution pigeon-holes you into a corner.
Usually, that hinders you from looking from other perspectives.
You don’t have to make up your mind.
You can just freely think.
Don’t fall into that pressure, it’s harmful.
You’re free to just be without an ‘a’ or ‘b’.


I’m so happy I found you

I’m so happy I found you.
I’m so happy I unraveled and let you loose.
I’m so happy that I became undone and you came to exist.
You were always important to me, just when I needed to release.
I never realized that if I never left you, there would be no need.
I stopped hiding and suppressing you and let you bleed.
Every word, every sentence released a string that pulled at my mind.
My heart longed to let you out, but it put me too behind.
Not knowing that the power in your words would allow my growth.
The power in your diction didn’t create fiction, but a story unwritten.
A story that needed to be told. A story that released everything I wanted to hold.
It catapulted me into becoming a little less undone.
It made me wish I would’ve never fought a war that was already won.


I found out you wrote poems too

I found out you wrote poems too.
I found out that was how you get through.
You wrote poems on your heart, forever engraved.
You wrote poems on your heart, leaving a permanent stain.
I found out you wrote poems too and I loved you even more.


I love you, but I’m hanging up now.

Love. The idea of love in itself can be overpowering. The idea of giving, giving, giving and hopefully being reciprocated can frighten some and entice others. You tend to feel that you always have to be there. You always have to give your all. You always need to let them know that they are loved. However, I have a question for you. Do you love yourself the same way?


Happiness.

Happiness is not defined by having a perfect life.
Happiness is about being satisfied with what you have,
while still having the courage to reach for more.


Lean Not On Your Own Independence…*Conditions Apply

Don’t mix independence with ignorance.
No one makes it on their own.
Embrace your relationships, including the one with yourself.


It was genuine.
It was real.
However, lies make sleep come easier.


Need.

To a certain extent, we are all afraid of being alone.
Even the most confident.
The seat on the plane gets quiet. The room darkens.
The bed feels bigger than usual and silence is deafening.
We all need somebody. A body. Something.
The book eventually ends. The screen eventually dies.
Quiet starts to surround us. The ideas begin to dwindle.
We never want to be alone all the time. Even the quietest.
We are all afraid of sounding desperate, not knowing desperation
Can induce courage. We are just trying to find our persons.
Our person that makes us feel alive. Our person that makes us thrive.
It’s not weak to not want to be alone. It is human. Everybody needs somebody.